Monthly Archives: May 2012

If a president’s portrait is hung should the artist be hanged?

As the fury over The Spear painting grows, Brett Murray has been hounded by journalists on a soundbyte mission. He has managed to evade most of them. However, we convinced the artist whose painting has touched the president on his … Continue reading

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It takes a clever dick to crack killer crosswords

Lance Armstrong’s life is in my hands. I have uncovered a plot to kill him. And I know the killers are planning to bump off the great cyclist with a lance. They have a twisted sense of humour. I phone … Continue reading

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Saving face when the troll e-tolls

Welcome to EIM, Extreme Image Makeover. A good image is wonderful, but it’s fragile. Let’s face it: people are fickle when your rep is in a pickle. One moment you’re a popular president and everyone wants to give you a … Continue reading

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Putting power back into my pen is… well, it’s hard

“I don’t understand,” I tell her. “This has, um, er, never happened to me before.” My mistress, Joni The Jam, looks disappointed, but she puts on a brave face.  “It’s no big deal,” she says and then utters the five … Continue reading

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